Lack thereof will surely lead to my downfall...
Teaching is alot about self discipline so far. The discipline to plan each lesson ahead of time, the discipline to mark 30 books with lucid comments, the discipline to write 60 reports over a weekend, the discipline to give up some of your holiday to look at the curriculum and think through a half term of lessons across 5 or more different classes ahead of time, the discipline to ask other teachers for advice and sift through the mountains of resources available to help, the discipline not to show your emotion when confronted with rudeness, laziness, indifference, stupidity or all of the above!
I've never been that disciplined. I am completely capable of being organised and would never have been successful as a marketer without it but I preferred to exercise the right to be spontaneous, unplanned and doing the minimum necessary to get by - winging it. As I climbed the ranks at Diageo it became easier to do so, placing the burden on those around me to compensate. I can't do that anymore and it's stretching me way beyond my comfort zone, which is GOOD.
The trouble is, I'm not sure how long I can keep it up. I know it's the right thing to do and as a result I am better prepared and deliver a better lesson. Winging it was always my thing and it's very tempting, especially when I look at my more experienced colleagues who jot a couple of key points in their diary and off they go. The good thing is that I've tried it a couple of times and it's gone horribly wrong. The other good thing is that I know the right thing to do and will keep striving to do the right thing. Maybe in 10 years I can start winging it again.
Day 360 - Stress
I have come across many references to teacher stress in the last year but what kind of stress have I personally experienced and how does it compare to corporate stress?
Picking up a completely new career at the age of 41 which involves a massive pay cut and moving countries has certainly been stressful but on the whole it has been 'good' stress. This is something I have chosen to do and having done so, I have greeted the majority of challenges head on rather than resisted them being imposed on me. That makes a big difference.
I have certainly not experienced this level of physical fatigue over such an extended period. When you are in the classroom teaching, there is no 'out' clause that allows you to disappear into the staff room and recharge. As such, 7 weeks of constant teaching is much like presenting marketing plans 3 or 4 times a day, 5 days a week...with an audience that isn't paid to be there! I have certainly had periods of fatigue before, many induced by too many long distance flights and alcohol enhanced late nights, but never for more than 1 or 2 weeks and always with the get out clause of spending a day in my office with the door closed.
The bigger, most appreciated difference is that I have not had to deal with any build up of the mental (and emotional) stress that I had to wrestle with in the past 10 years. Most of it was self-induced but the level at which I was operating meant that there was no escape from it day to day, year to year. It started when we moved to Amsterdam and never really left until I walked away. There were moments that I would prefer to forget, like sitting alone in a hotel room in New York the day before a planning meeting, crumbling under the responsibility I had been given (and asked for).
The pressures are very transient in teaching. I certainly get worked up before each lesson and if I fail to plan the night before a 5 lesson day, I have been known to wake up in a cold sweat. However, the minute the bell goes, the stress disappears. If I have a good lesson, it feels great and I believe I can be a great teacher. If I have a bad lesson, I try and make it better the next time without agonising over it...the most I will teach one class is 3 hours a week, so how much damage can I be doing with the odd stinker?!
Picking up a completely new career at the age of 41 which involves a massive pay cut and moving countries has certainly been stressful but on the whole it has been 'good' stress. This is something I have chosen to do and having done so, I have greeted the majority of challenges head on rather than resisted them being imposed on me. That makes a big difference.
I have certainly not experienced this level of physical fatigue over such an extended period. When you are in the classroom teaching, there is no 'out' clause that allows you to disappear into the staff room and recharge. As such, 7 weeks of constant teaching is much like presenting marketing plans 3 or 4 times a day, 5 days a week...with an audience that isn't paid to be there! I have certainly had periods of fatigue before, many induced by too many long distance flights and alcohol enhanced late nights, but never for more than 1 or 2 weeks and always with the get out clause of spending a day in my office with the door closed.
The bigger, most appreciated difference is that I have not had to deal with any build up of the mental (and emotional) stress that I had to wrestle with in the past 10 years. Most of it was self-induced but the level at which I was operating meant that there was no escape from it day to day, year to year. It started when we moved to Amsterdam and never really left until I walked away. There were moments that I would prefer to forget, like sitting alone in a hotel room in New York the day before a planning meeting, crumbling under the responsibility I had been given (and asked for).
The pressures are very transient in teaching. I certainly get worked up before each lesson and if I fail to plan the night before a 5 lesson day, I have been known to wake up in a cold sweat. However, the minute the bell goes, the stress disappears. If I have a good lesson, it feels great and I believe I can be a great teacher. If I have a bad lesson, I try and make it better the next time without agonising over it...the most I will teach one class is 3 hours a week, so how much damage can I be doing with the odd stinker?!
Day 359 - Completer Finisher
I remember doing one of those psychometric tests when I first started work back in 1989. I have done loads since but I have a very vivid memory of the first one. I cannot remember what it was called but it was all about how you worked on a team. There were 6 or so profiles and I came out as a strong Shaper and weak Completer Finisher - perfect leadership profile for my future career! Unfortunately the latter weakness has ultimately resulted in me failing to finish this blog 6 days short of the full 365. Unbelievable.
One of the other profiles was 'Plant'. I've always wanted to be a plant. In this context, a plant sits in a team meeting, looking highly dishevelled, completely disorganised and not really listening. Every now and then, they look up and everyone listens to the pearl of wisdom that pops out. His inability to function otherwise is indulged and overlooked.
One of the other profiles was 'Plant'. I've always wanted to be a plant. In this context, a plant sits in a team meeting, looking highly dishevelled, completely disorganised and not really listening. Every now and then, they look up and everyone listens to the pearl of wisdom that pops out. His inability to function otherwise is indulged and overlooked.
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